Another practical rule of advice in helping prepare an Atrium which engenders true freedom is to look at the needs of the community as a whole. We spend our time in the Atrium together, listening and speaking with God, and the way that we each live in this space can either provide or deprive others of that opportunity as well. In the 3-6-year-old or Level 1 Atrium, the adult takes on a large role in helping guard the needs of the community until the older children (in a new Atrium) or returning children (in an established space) are able to assist both through their modeling of appropriate behavior and in their calling others on to live well in the Atrium. The rule of the "3 Ds" is often cited in conversations on this topic. Thus, we, as adults, step in immediately if behavior is "Dangerous, Destructive, or Disruptive." If what we are seeing does not fit under one of these three adjectives we need to observe for a time, watching to see if we can discover what the need or purpose is for the behavior. Steps in observing questionable behavior include:
- If you are concerned about a child's actions, sit near the child, saying nothing. Often the child, if he is doing something inappropriate, will stop that behavior when you are near because of the relationship of trust and respect which has been built between the two of you.
- If the child continues the behavior, ask the child if he can tell you about his work. Often a child's explanation has stopped my judgementalism in its tracks and has, additionally, provided me some beautiful opportunities for prayer. In one example, a 4yo was working with the Nativity and Adoration of the Shepherds. The sheep were all right up around the infant Jesus in the manger. When asked about this the child said, "They are licking Him because they love Him!" I have often pondered, since then, if I, too, come so close to the One who loves me so very much.
- If the child's explanation does not seem fitting to the Atrium space, you might offer to read the Scripture that accompanies the work or to remind the child of how the work is used. At times the child agrees and this provides a beautiful opportunity to recall the deep truth of the work and reset the child in his use of the material.
- However, at times the child does not want a reminder of his work. In this case it may be necessary to invite the child to restore his work and choose something else until it can be re-presented by the catechist. An example of this situation comes from a story told by an assistant regarding a 3yo using the Nativity and the Adoration of the Shepherds. The adult had approached the child who seemed to be playing with the work and, as in #2, had asked the child about her work. The child said, "It's a birthday party for Thomas!" The adult reminded the child that this work is about Jesus' birthday. The child said again, "No, it's a birthday party for Thomas." After the adult's offer to read the Scripture passage to the child was refused, the adult asked the child to restore her work and choose another material, which, given a few minutes of space, the child did.